Thursday, August 21, 2008

Writing

I'm in office now. It had been raining the whole day. My brain is so damn lazy to work. I think i'm not alone. My colleagues all seem very dreamy and floaty. Surprisingly, i'm not the last to reach the office. Those who are earlier than me in most of the days are later than me and my boss is not here yet. It is 12.14pm now. My brain is not focusing on what I am suppose to do today. I'm thinking of yesterday. My phone conversation and msn conversation last night. My meeting last night and what am i going to do tomorrow morning. It is out of focus. I just wanna think about yesterday and tomorrow and not today. I had no idea why is my brain rejecting today's thoughts. Is it because there's nothing to worry today or Is it because it can sense more coming tomorrow from what happen yesterday. Chim bo? I never expect a lazy brain at this moment can suddenly come out with such chim question for itself.

How to settle? I can only watch my steps and move on. Not that i can predict. I actually had this thought that i can predict future. Of cos most of them is about myself. It was until this morning when i had a long chat wif my long time best buddy XW that i realised something important in life. I realised the secret on how i can predict my future. Simply because i'm writing the story of my life. I decide what i want to do. I decide when to let go and when to stay on. I decide when patience is needed and when i should whacked the table and turned my back around. That is life.

Sometimes we judged others. We claimed that they are stupid or they had no principle in life. But we don't write their story. We just read their story. They wrote it themself. What we can see is those that were written and not those that is going to be write. We can copy and paste than edit from others but the conclusion remains. We can help others write their life. But when we help them, we are writing it into our life too. So it is always up to us to decide when the full stop comes in. Sigh...i'm still thinking how to write my life tomorrow.

Miracles and Coincidences are some additional bonuses in life. It is not something that you write. It is something that came up after u finish planning what to write. Trust me. Miracles and Coincidences always add spices into your writing. Whether it is good or bad, it always flamboyantly colour your nicely jotted draft. So when u nicely plan your ending, it might turn ugly or beautiful. That is what you call risk in life. Haha.

One more thing that can spoil your beautiful ending is when someone else put a pen into your draft. Or when someone else's ending which coexist with yours contradicts with yours. Or when someone pour a bucket of paint into your writing. Worst of all, is when you don't even know why. That is when your are lost. Haha. Life is difficult.

Therefore i find it foolish to plan ahead. But if you don't plan, you had no vision. I think we should aim for a target and plan for each day. Don't aim for a target and had the whole journey written. We might end up in a cave.

No matter how good a writer can be, there are always obstacles and miracles that will flourish the smooth writing.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wah Ban you at work very free issit? Free to write blog one ar!! walao eh

dominiqueban said...

sometimes nia..u see i how long nvr update d...

Unknown said...

Chim~ What u wrote in this post is very chim~ Although it's written in simple English, it's still deep for me to interpret. Haha! Well, I think I'll have to read it one more time to get ur meaning ;)

Thanks for sharing, Ban :)